


Truth Is Stranger

by Originaldiva



Category: Professional Wrestling
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2010-06-06
Updated: 2010-06-06
Packaged: 2017-10-09 23:07:32
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,180
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/92600
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Originaldiva/pseuds/Originaldiva
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Jeff and Matt poke a little fun at some of the stuff written about them.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Truth Is Stranger

**Author's Note:**

> Written back In '03, hence the mentions of Matt and Lita.

"Found another one."  
Matt Hardy looked up from the magazine he was reading as his younger brother sat at his computer desk with his feet up on one end, chair tilted back precariously and eating Ben and Jerry's Chunky Monkey from the carton. It was Matt's off day and he decided to pay his brother a visit. When he got there, he found his brother going through fan fiction sites out of curiosity, something Jeff did for fun whenever he had the chance since he found out about them after putting his name through a search engine, just for fun. Now that Jeff was home, he was doing it more often and kept Matt up to date on the statistics such as how many times Jeff 'slept around', had an eating disorder or 'cut' himself in despair for one reason or another.  
On the menu for today was how many times Jeff committed "suicide".  
Matt thought it was weird his younger brother would want to read what had been written about him, but when Jeff mentioned he was being written about in almost the same fashion, he couldn't help but be drawn into Jeff's 'game' of "How many ways to harm a Hardy".  
"Another one?" Matt looked back at his magazine. "How did you die this time?"  
Jeff squinted at the LCD screen in front of him. "Suicide by cutting."  
"That's what? The fifth one this week?"  
"Seventh. There's at least two more over at FanFiction.net."  
Matt chuckled.  
Jeff licked his spoon before looking at his older brother. "You know for once I would like to be portrayed as something more than some waifish, femme, suicidal drama queen."  
"Oh but, Jeff, you play the role so well." Matt cracked before feeling something cold hit his head. He reached his hand up and saw the ice cream dripping off his fingers. "Bitch," he muttered as he grabbed a tissue and wiped his head off.  
"Oh but, Matty, I play the role so well." Jeff said in an effeminate voice before laughing, setting his brother off as well.  
"Okay Skittles, behave yourself."  
Jeff wrinkled his nose. "You know I never could understand why I'm called that in every fanfic there is about us."  
Matt peeked over the magazine. "It has to be the hair. That and you're just so sweet." Matt smirked.  
Jeff scoffed before reaching for his mouse and clicked a few links. "Hey Matt?"  
"What?"  
"How much do you love me?"  
Matt looked over the top of the magazine, trying not to laugh, knowing something was coming. "Like a brother, why?"  
"Would you be willing to let me pour hot wax over your body as a testament to that?"  
Matt gave in and laughed. "I don't even let Amy wax my legs."  
"Shame, you really could use it."  
Matt flipped off his little brother before tossing the magazine to one side and getting up to walk over where Jeff was sitting. Crouching beside Jeff's chair, Matt looked at the screen. "I tell you there are some strange people out there."  
"So true."  
Matt looked at Jeff. "Beth read any of this yet?"  
Jeff nodded. "Yeah. She hates the "Mary Sues", said she finds them utterly boring, but she said any time you and I decide to consummate the love we've had for each other since we were children to let her watch with a video camera."  
Matt chuckled. "That's what Ames said too." He walked behind his brother to take control of the mouse and made a few clicks. "What is it with everyone paring me up with Jay while you and Adam get all the fun?"  
"Because we're sooooo cuuute together!" Jeff swooned before offering Matt his ice cream. Matt shook his head and Jeff put the lid on the carton before stashing it in the little refrigerator that was by the desk. "Besides, you've been paired with Adam too."  
"Yeah, but it's not the same. I mean don't get me wrong, Jay's a decent guy and all, but he is a little grumpy sometimes, and Adam snores like a chainsaw."  
Jeff laughed.  
"Uh oh," Matt says.  
"What?"  
"Another you and Raven fic."  
Jeff rolled his eyes. "I swear, Scott's a nice guy and all but I'm not sure he'd be my type."  
"It has bondage in too." Matt chirped.  
"I swear, is there something about me that screams _'I'm a sub! Beat me! Rape me! Because no matter how badly you treat me I'll always love you!'_ ?"  
"Hey I've had my share of BDSM as well. Usually with..." Matt tried to think. "Scott."  
"Oh great." Jeff bent down to open the little refrigerator door to take out a bottle of water. He offered one to Matt, who took it. "We have the same 'boyfriend' what's next? Us swapping clothes and hair care tips?"  
Matt shuddered. "God, I hope not." Another click. "Oh this is precious."  
"What?"  
"Paul and Kurt."  
"I bet Stephanie'll love that."  
"I think she would. It's Paul and Kurt who might have the problem."  
"Yeah, Paul's so damn image conscious I don't think he'd ever see himself as a bottom." Matt continued clicking through the links. "Nice photo manips though."  
"Yeah, I'll give them that. Some of those banners are nice looking."  
"Ah, here we go," Matt said. "Amy and Trish fic."  
"Ooh," Jeff perked up.  
"Think we should print this out and let either of them look at it."  
"What, and have it fall into the wrong hands? Vince sees this, can you imagine the storyline he'll come up with for them?"  
"Yeah. That's true." Another random clicking "Oh man," Matt groaned. "There's another one about the both of us."  
"Aww what's wrong, Matt? You no love your little brother?" Jeff joked in a baby-talk voice.  
"Not when it comes to you smearing chocolate icing on me and licking it off."  
"Hmmmm..." Jeff mused before looking at the "what the fuck?" look on Matt's face. "Oh come on man, I'm just joking."  
"God I hope so." Matt took a drink of water before wrapping an arm around his younger brother, "Oh Jeffy! Ever since they brought you home in the bassinet, I've never been able to take my eyes or my hands off of you.." Matt said before dissolving in a laughing fit.  
"EW! Dude!" Jeff backed away, laughing as well. When they settled down, Jeff looked around. "What time is it?"  
"Almost three."  
"When's your flight?"  
"Nine."  
"Want to head out and help me with the moat?"  
"Can't." Matt stood, grimacing at the popping in his knees. "I told Dad I'd stop by, not to mention I've got some laundry to do."  
"So you want me to pick you up to take you to the airport?"  
"Sure."  
"Okay, how does eight thirty sound?"  
"Is that normal time or Jeff time?"  
"Normal."  
"Okay. I should be around by then. Don't rot your eyes reading that stuff." Matt closed the bottle of water and walked with it to the door.  
"Love you, Matt."  
Matt paused and looked at Jeff, who shouted, "_NOT LIKE THAT!_"


End file.
